Like Katy Perry.
I'm not going to lie. As a red-blooded American male, I can't help but find myself magnetized towards the current Mrs. Russell Brand. Her affinity to amplify her, ahem, assets and the way she almost never fails to look like a pinup model certify her as one of the most attractive women in pop.
Attractive? Yes. Subtle? No.
Now, while I'm not much for top 40 pop these days, I'll have to admit that the sunny California Girls and the more assured Teenage Dream are a guilty pleasure, even when ruined by futile attempts at creating social commentary.
And then there's her new single Firework.
The third release from Teenage Dream, Firework is an uplifting song...at least if your the kind of person who's uplifted by Creed. Our first warning sign that something is off is the opening line:
"Do you ever feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?"
Wait...what? As far as a metaphor for feeling down and out, I believe someone could think of about of a million other better examples. Although, maybe I'm wrong and I can't come up with good metaphors...that makes me feel like a can of corn...
Speaking of corn, you'd think it was a 4th of July barbecue because there are lots of fireworks...shooting from Katy's chest.
Are you tasting the cheese yet? It get's worse.
Since the song is completely unique and original in that it's about being yourself and loving you for who you are, there's plenty of good after-school-special material in this video. As Katy sings and spews her pyrotechnic mammaries across the city, lots of young people gain the courage to do what they never believed they could do before. Things like taking their shirts of and jumping into a swimming pool, and my favorite, dazzling a gang of muggers with magic tricks. You don't see David Blaine getting hit up for his wallet now do you? That reminds me of someone...
But the video's director didn't stop there. They had to go all out and pull the trump card of emotional pandering. Yes, there is a sick child. Through hearing Katy's hypnotic singing, and witnessing a woman giving birth to a wad of fireworks (I kid you not) the sick child discovers that through the power of self awareness, he/she too can cure their disease...except not really. The child does however learn that it can go outside and dance in a circle with other people who are on fire. Why is no one alarmed by this? But I digress, I think it's time you see this bubbling fondue pot of cheese for yourself. Enjoy the Roman Candle bazongas, and the rather Glee-like moments.
